UNCLE NEAREST RECEIVERSHIP & LAWSUIT : LIVE UPDATES #2
This is the new LIVE UPDATE page for the ongoing saga of the Uncle Nearest Receivership which was ordered on 8/14. If you haven’t been following along, please check out this piece first. It’s a decent breakdown of how we got here and here’s the link to the original update page. This page will be heavily seasoned with opinions, thoughts, and commentary and that will be italicized.
If you feel like sharing your story or have any tips feel free to contact me here. Your anonymity and confidentiality will be respected.
Did I miss anything?
UPDATE 3/23-
I took a week off from updates because of real life stuff, not because The Weaver (TM) was here in New Orleans. Apparently I didn’t miss much. Bankruptcy filed, Receivership ended, then the receiver went ham AND eggs in court, bankruptcy was dismissed, Receivership NOT ended, Fawn counting her illusory W’s, and we are pretty much where we were when last week began.
I just started pulling the documents down to look at, and while they’re funny, they really didn’t add much to what’s happening so don’t expect a full breakdown on those. I’ll be writing some stuff this week, hopefully we get an order or two.. There is a filing today, and I’ll work that in.
I had to close the last updates page because dear lord it took forever to load, and the lag was finally intolerable. So here’s the new page and here’s what’s on my mind this week with some random hits.
We are waiting for the Three Appraisals on the Martha’s Vineyard house.
We are waiting on the Judges order for inclusion.
Kate makes a boatload of money (more on this below) and Hi Kate! (TM).
French “would you like fries with that” Rankin has a cool name but is a mean girl.
Kitten Kelli got some skibbedypaps.
The photog did her dirty on this one. #CLEARANCETHESHELVES
Now, let’s air out some laundry.
Victoria Eady Butler is an employee of Uncle Nearest (not Nearest Green Distillery), and even though she’s trotted out like a show pony as a “master blender,” she’s listed as the “DIRECTOR OF ADMINISTRATION.” What the hell is a director of administration? I dunno, but she’s paid $120,000.14 a year for doing it. This annual salary does NOT include bonuses, nor the worthless stock options she gets. She holds about 100,000 options. I’ll buy the all for $1.
Matthew Aubrey is a Market Manager (Unsure which one), and Matty makes $113,652.24, not bad for someone who is also not a master blender.
Nicole Carter, who is a Brand Steward makes a paltry $95,287.66.
Chuck Cronkhite who is Vice President of Sales, makes $226,012.54 presumably by selling things at 40% off. Also, owns about 40,000 worthless options.
Lavar Michael Douglas, also not a master blender, but Market Manager, makes $89,105.12 (no idea what market) which is less than Matthew.
Brenton Kyle Doyle another Brand Steward (not the last) makes $82,225.00 (must be new, because no pennies on the salary).
Katharine Jerkens (Hi Kate!) who is the Chief Business Officer and handmaid to The Weaver (TM) makes the breathtakingly stupid salary of $271,215.10. That is presumably why one might be so inclined to concoct dubious sales projections and share that with Captain Phillip who undoubtedly trusts her about as much as I trust a Monk with a Mercedes. She also gets whopping bonuses, and owns worthless shares she bought personally, and she and her husband also own worthless shares, and she gets even more worthless stock options too! Good on ya Kate! Also, fun fact, a lot of people really don’t like her, sorry Kate! She has 100,000 worthless options. She and her husband bought 16,666 series A shares. Lil Ooopsie.
Lauren Landry is a National Consumer Events Manager. Lauren makes $87,000.16 a year. Not sure if that’s too much or too little, and Lauren is undoubtedly liked more thank Kate.
William James Madison another Market Manager, makes $107,099.98. Also not a master blender.
Evette Martinez is Human Resources. I’ll bet that Evette enjoys her job very much, keeps a bowl of candy on her desk, and has “never had a bad day in her life”. $91,093.34. Evette might be a wonderful human that happens to have 2,000 worthless options.
Sergio Nicholas another Brand Steward (hey can I be a brand steward too?) makes more then Evette in HR and clocks in at $98,146.36.
Steven Alexander Pollock, Director of Mid West Sales makes $128,520.08 (Clearance the shelves baby!)
Damian Vincent Shine Vice President of National & Global Accounts comes in $157,500.46. He has 40,000 worthless options.
Constance Rachel Stanford, Brand Steward (isn’t Fawn THE Brand Steward?) is the lowest paid Brand Steward at $78,750.10.
Andrew G. Stein is the Manager of Emerging Markets. $107,099.98. I’m sure there are still some emerging markets somewhere right? 2,000 worthless options.
Jeffrey Timms Market Manager $92,400.10.
Alain Abraham Viny Market Manager $115,784.76
Lindsay Walden Executive Assistant $90,001.60.
The Weaver (TM) President (not CEO LOL!) $95,000.10. Notably this “salary” is as farcical as the non-functioning still at the distillery. She gets WHOPPING bonuses, has an EXTRAORDINARILY stupid monthly expense budget (which before the receivership she would just blow through and exceed often), and also, owns a lot of worthless shares in a lot of worthless companies (mostly because she broke them). 2,325,000 worthless options.
Now why would I air out this laundry? Well, I didn’t. Kitten Kelli (TM) did in her filings for The Weaver (TM).
I’m not going to show the rank and file monies, except for Christy Meeks, who is paid more than Fawn Weaver is for “Digital Content & Engagement” aka Social Media and comments deleter. Fawn is paid $3,653.85 every two weeks. Christy is paid $3,846.16. Also, she blocked me, so it’s kinda personal (wink wink). I wonder what her bot budget is.
The Weaver (TM) was at one of my favorite stores while she was here, and she signed some unbothered and unmoved bottles.
RECEIVER’S NOTICE OF MARTHA’S VINEYARD APPRAISERS
“Upon receipt of the Court’s Order, the Receiver asked his real estate professional, Jennifer DaSilva of Compass Realtors in Edgartown, Massachusetts to provide the information requested by the Court. Ms. DaSilva reported that it would be difficult to identify five real estate appraisers that routinely operated on Martha’s Vineyard, because the majority of the work is done by two or three appraisers. Ms. DaSilva has provided a list of five appraisers, but one has recently retired. Below is the list of appraisers and the information about those appraisers Ms. DaSilva was able to gather for this Court.”
Cap’N Phillip earning his keep this week big time.
“Jeffrey Ciciora; Munsell Appraisal Service – Mr. Ciciora was born on the island and has been a full-time appraiser on Martha’s Vineyard since 1998. Ms. DaSilva reports that he and Bill Cleary (below) perform approximately 90% of the appraisals on Martha’s Vineyard collectively. When asked for a timeline, Ms. Ciciora asked whether this was the property “with the lawsuits”. He then declined to give a timeline, indicating that he might be unwilling to perform an appraisal.”
Jeffrey clearly wants to not have to appear in court to defend his work against the relentless stupid filings that would be sure to come.
“Bill Cleary; Martha’s Vineyard Real Estate Appraisers – Martha’s Vineyard Appraisers was the first real estate appraisal company established on Martha’s Vineyard. Mr. Cleary has been performing appraisals in Martha’s Vineyard since 2004. He specializes in appraisals of residential, commercial, and land use. When asked for a timeline, he indicated that he could perform an appraisal in 21-28 days.”
“Matthew Bellas; Bellas Appraisal Service – Mr. Bellas is a certified residential appraiser who has been appraising property for 23 years, 10 of which has been on Martha’s Vineyard. Mr. Bellas has appraised this property within the last month for the lender for the proposed buyers. Because of that, he indicated that he could provide an updated appraisal within 14 days.”
“Harlan Gibbs; Martha’s Vineyard Real Estate Appraisals – Mr. Gibbs is a certified appraiser who has appraised real estate on Martha’s Vineyard since 1975. When contacted about a proposed timeline for this appraisal, he did not return the telephone call.”
Who would want to return that call?
“Shirley Medeiros; Medeiros Appraisal Services – Ms. Medeiros is a long-time appraiser on Martha’s Vineyard. However, Ms. DaSilva reports that she has recently retired. It is unclear whether she would be willing to appraise this property for the Court.”
I’m sure we will see a 14571 page filing opposing this.